I love being able to share my current book list with you and since I’ve discovered The New York Public Library’s mobile app I’ve been able to download and read tons of books right on my phone for FREE. A bookworm’s dream! I’m currently reading a few books including one that I didn’t think I’d enjoy, Luvvie Ajai’s I’m Judging You. Reason being for the initial trepidation has everything to do with this current “It’s cool to be mean/You can’t sit with us/the only way to get a few clicks is to degrade people” atmosphere. I thought this book would be filled with these snippy antidotes disguised as a smart or helpful read. I was wrong…sort of. It is steeped in shade. The title alone gives that away, however it’s a realistic view of many of life’s everyday situations. It’s not mean for the sake of being mean, it’s brutally honest and so far, I’m enjoying it.
Another book that I decided to give a try was Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi. This novel follows the tale of two half-sisters born in different villages in 18th Century Ghana. The tale follows their lineage from their very different beginnings, one sister being married off to an Englishman the other imprisoned in the dungeon below and sold into slavery. It’s most definitely a page turner.
A few other books that I’ve downloaded: No Name in the Street by James Baldwin, Buddhism for Dummies and I’ve also been quite curious about The Nation of Islam so I’ve decided to try and read The Qur’an…I know, very light reading material over here J. Happy reading!
If you’ve been a follower of my site for the past few years, you know that sometimes I write! sometimesshewrites.com is a passion project of mine dedicated solely to my writing. Short stories, poems, think pieces, spoken word pieces etc will all be shared on sometimeshewrites.com. This new website is in no way intended to replace shavonmeyers.com and will only focus on my writing. So if you’re curious, head over to sometimesshewrites.com and see what all the fuss is about 🙂
My President is black!
Next year, I won’t be able to say that SO, I’ll say it now for what will likely be the last time that I can say it for awhile.
About 7 years ago when I first decided to take my photography to the next level, I started as many photographers do. I took classes, learned as much as I could and shot as much as I could. This meant shooting a TON of events. You name it, I was there. Didn’t matter the event or if there was a budget attached to it (which most if not all of the time, there wasn’t) I just wanted to get out there and shoot, share my images and be seen on the scene as a photographer (most definitely not my style now). My first big gig was to photograph various events for a member of the NAACP at it’s 100th year celebration at the Hilton Hotel in Midtown. This was a huge event with the main speaker being non other than President Barack Obama.
The universe aligned perfectly to even allow me in the building, let alone capture images for one of the representatives and possibly of the then newly elected President Barack Obama, but it didn’t start out that way. After hearing about the event a few months earlier, I applied for a press pass for “The B Side Show” which was a podcast that I hosted and produced back then. I picked up my official pass and details about the events. The President was the highlight speaker, but only pre approved national news organizations and members of the press would be allowed into the auditorium to cover the speech for national new outlets. Blogs and podcasts be damned. Note: this was 7 years ago, before people even truly understood what blogs and podcasts were. Today, SOME of them are highly respected outlets of information, 7 years ago when I started mine, people scratched their heads and wondered why anyone would listen to a radio show online. Meh. My goal was to cover the event for my show and blog at the time. Sure I would have LOVED to be in the same room as the President during his speech but with no real connection to any national news outlets, it didn’t seem possible…to most.
The hotel was a few block away from my then current job at Sirius XM Radio. I was able to work my 9-5, leave and walk up the block to the event. It couldn’t get any better, right? I bolted out of the doors at Sirius XM (back then just Sirius) with the first DSLR that I’d ever purchased and my standard lens kit, press pass in hand, for ready for whatever. I made it to the hotel with no problem. Got to the entrance, showed my press pass to the attendant and made my way inside.
So now I’m here! I’m inside
The Carter ugh, The Hilton (but I did have that same excitement as Ice T and crew when Pookie finally made his way into the core of the operation). Now what? I didn’t have anyone on the inside to guide me through anything. I had my list of events and speeches that I was allowed to photograph but there was no point person to check in with. The President was scheduled to speak the following day, so this was the warm up to the burn down so to speak. One of the main days of musical performances, lectures and other NAACP events that led up to the President’s address. So, I made my my around. Pulled out my camera, put my press pass around my neck and waited. I was ready, but there was nothing happening. I’d gotten there early and none of the events were scheduled to take place at that time so I roamed around looking for anything to capture. I made my way into an event space for one of the speakers and performances of the evening. I stood close to the stage, camera in hand and again, I waited. Then something happened, the universe came through in a major way. A handsome young black man who worked for the organization approached me. “Are you photographing the event?” he asked. “Yes.” I replied eager to do something other than wait. “Would you mind helping me out, my name is…and I’m the Director of…for the NAACP and I need someone to follow me around and get images of me and the celebrities of the evening” he said. “OF COURSE!” is what I hope I said. Like his name, title and the exact conversation, I can’t remember every detail but it ended up with me following this young man around for hours meeting, photographing and mingling with celebrities and activists that I grew up seeing. HE was the plug as folk would say today. He knew everyone and everyone knew him and I was his photographer for the evening. PUSH THROUGH UNIVERSE.
We ended the evening with me having a ton of photos to sift through and him mentioning the main event the next day, The President’s speech. “Will you be here for that?” he asked. “Well, yes but I don’t have a pass to get into the actual auditorium.” I told him. “Ok…we’ll see what we can do about that. Be here tomorrow and I’ll try and get you in.” “OF COURSE!” is again what I hope I said, either way, I was excited and knew I would be there.
If you live in NYC or any town in which any President has ever visited, you know the madness that I am about to speak on. When the President comes to town everything shuts DOWN. I’ve never seen a city stand still and have so much movement at the same time quite like it does when the president arrives. I figured the word would get out about the President being at the event but I didn’t think it would be Times Square New Years Eve crazy. After working my shift at Sirius, I left a bit earlier to try and avoid the crowd. Unfortunately, I could see the crowd from a few blocks away as I approached the hotel. Excellent. I somehow managed to get myself to the front of the crowd with the NYPD and their barricades. Here comes the bullshit I thought. I showed them my pass and without a word, they opened the barricades and let me through. It was like the parting of the Red damn Sea! If there was ANYTHING that would stop my ass from getting into the building SURELY it would be NY’s finest, but no, the universe kept on providing…
I made my way in and called my contact. “You made it!” he seemed thrilled but not as thrilled as I was to make it in the building. Again, I don’t remember how exactly the conversation went but it ended with me getting access to the auditorium in which the President would speak. He told me that I would be seated next to the official White House TV crew. Some national media outlets were allowed inside the room, but most were only allowed in the separate media room to watch the event on tv screens. He pointed out the secret service people and other people that I should be aware of. He showed me to my section and off he went. He had to return to his duties and would actually get to meet and greet the President as an NAACP member. “Get whatever shots that you can get, but most of all have fun and enjoy his speech…” he said warmly. My heart smiles to this day when I think about the kindness and willingness of this stranger to give a newbie like myself an opportunity to shine. Hey universe, hey…
And then, there was The President.
The room exploded with applause as he walked on stage. Newly elected, youthful and full of energy. His speech provide inspiration, hope and promise. He gratefully acknowledged the past and looked onto the future. As a black woman, seeing my first black President address members of the NAACP at its 100 year celebration was one of those defining moments in my life. A monumental and historic experience that I will cherish for all of my days. But I also had to work! After the initial shock, excitement and moment of clarity, I picked up my camera and went to work. I couldn’t move around the auditorium and I had several huge tv cameras in my line of sight. Not mention the fact that I was situated on the balcony and was only working with a consumer level camera and standard lens as a novice to the art…so my photos weren’t great LOL. In fact they sucked. They suck to me now, 7 years later after learning more about the craft, myself and my equipment. After sharpening my skills with years of practice and investing in better equipment. But back then, they were ok. In fact, everyone including the person that I eventually delivered the final images to thought they were great. Keep in mind, the NAACP most certainly had other photographers present that were able to capture up close and personal images of The President backstage with other prominent NAACP members. The White House also always has its staff photographers on hand to share images for the press that they have total control over. I was more of a Camera B/behind the scenes photographer for the President’s address. But nonetheless, a behind the scenes photographer for a historic event featuring President Barack Obama. Not bad for my first official gig.
“And when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it.” – Paul Coelho The Alchemist
Overall, all of the images, including the photos that I took at the various other events for the celebration, came out pretty good. Today, I strive for greatness and know that if the opportunity presented itself now, I’d excel at it with no problem. With the knowledge and skills that I’ve accumulated for my craft both in the field and in the classroom, there is no doubt in my mind that I would be able to provide exceptional images, even from a dimly lit balcony with tv cameras in my direct line of sight. Experience does that. Time and practice as well. Here’s the one thing that I had back then, even without the added skills and experience, I had confidence. I had it all! Did I know that my equipment wasn’t the best of the best? Yes. Did I let that stop me? No. Did I let the fact that I wasn’t as experienced as most scare me into backing out of this amazing opportunity? Hell no. I showed up, was ready to work, learn, listen and be open to the possibilities. That event, that moment in time solidified a lot of things for me, including my push to become a full time photographer. It proved to me that you don’t have to have a big name, huge following or sometimes, even the most knowledge in the room. You have to be willing to show up, step out on faith and be open to the possibilities. And let’s not forget, if you make mistakes, learn from them and move on! I am grateful that I had the universe working on my side that week and always. I’m grateful to the young brother that took a chance on me and offered an amazing opportunity to get my foot in the door. I’m grateful for being able to witness a black man with ties to the south side of Chicago be elected President in my lifetime and for the opportunity to watch him address those who helped create a path for himself, myself and the black youth that follow. Those images and that day are apart of my history.
No matter what happens with this election, UPDATE: Fuck Trump… I’m grateful that I was able to witness someone who looked like myself accomplish something that was so much bigger than myself. President Barak Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama inspire me to BE.
A NY Daily News article from January 2016 came across my social media feed highlighting a young Queens photographer by the name of Dark Cyanide. The teen captured photos of some of the city’s abandoned subway stations, you can see more of the photos here. It got me thinking about taking risks. I’ve ALWAYS wanted to do this. Sneak into one of the many access points throughout the city, camera in hand, ready to document the rarely seen underbelly of the beast that is New York City. I have an attraction to “dirty” things. Let me be clear, I am a neat freak. I do not enjoy dwelling or working in filth or clutter. I hate when things are not neat and tidy, but I am attracted to ruin. Buildings that have been demolished, abandoned areas, things that were once new and beautiful and in use but have been left unkept and are now abandoned, old and dirty (see my trip to the abandoned Immigrant Hospital on Ellis Island). So what’s stopping me from exploring the abandoned subways that I’ve yearned to document for so long? FEAR. Damn right. I’m scared AF to go down under to not only discover what is sure to be a wonderland of undocumented ruined city jewels but also the thousands of city rats, insects, people (yes, the “mole people”) and not to mention the risk of being electrocuted, arrested or catching something that my body can not properly fight off. This 19 year old and his friends have that 19 year old immortality that we all believe we have at 19 and I envy that a bit. The 30+ year old me knows damn well that I am not immortal and no picture is worth risking my safety, however, there is still a part of me that wants to take that risk.
I want to risk it all and take that literal leap down an old manhole in the middle of an abandoned city block and leave all of that fear on the city street above me. I want to roam the desolate subway tracks capturing the beauty in the ruins below. I want to stand perfectly still holding my breath as I try to hand hold a long exposure shot, because fuck a tripod in these uncertain conditions. I want to leap from track to track as the wind from an approaching train brushes across my face. I want to discover the unknown and be fearless while doing it. Do I want to do this alone? Nope. Am I saying that I’m going to do this at all? Absolutely not. What I am saying is, I do want to flirt with the idea of it. Risking it all. Even if not for this act in particular. Maybe I take a risk and start a project that I’ve always wanted to start. Maybe I risk some money on an investment and see where it leads me while not worrying about the potential to fail. Maybe I film that ambitious new completed screenplay that’s sitting on my desk (actually, this is already happening…stay tuned). Maybe I just jump for the sake of taking the leap, knowing that I’m risking it all, or nothing at all. Maybe, the fear is all in my head and the risk is an imaginary door whose certain defeat is as easy as me taking a breath, opening it and walking through it.
Just breath and risk it all (or nothing).
As the last week of July rolls around, I’m sharing 3 summer inspired pieces for the July edition of my #findyoursummer project. I have to admit, this month has been a bit of a rollercoaster in the world. Between the various terrorist attacks around the world to the murders of innocent black and brown individuals by police officers in my own backyard to this mess of a presidential campaign, it’s been quite the challenge to come up with a new piece for the series. Then I remembered that THIS is exactly what it’s about. “Finding your summer” is all about finding your paradise, your heaven or you peace in a world filled with chaos and sometimes that means revising whatever it was that gave you that special “summer” feeling. So I went back in time a bit and decided to revisit a few of my favorite summer inspired pieces to share for this month. Reminiscing, revisiting and remembering all filter into “finding your summer” so I invite you to take a sunny trip down memory lane and get lost in the pieces. Enjoy!
A Love Supreme
Mold my heart to yours.
I’ll mimic every beat.
Trace every crease with my lips and leave behind my devotion.
I’m a slave to your touch.
Your love lives in me
Can’t you see it?
Take my hand and guide me through your dreams.
Give me your night terrors to slay and I’ll never stop fighting.
Let me kiss away your pain and shield you from the world’s evil glare.
Your love lives in me.
Can’t u see it?
This love supreme
Can’t you feel it?
I see your lips in the clouds and now pray for rainy days.
You eyes make themselves known in sunsets off the coasts of
Beckoning me to play in the valley that is your being.
Let me in.
Please let my love enter your heart.
Don’t be afraid.
Don’t run away.
Please stay and allow me to be here for you
Because you are here.
My love for you is strong and lives,
Can’t you see it?
Your love lives in me.
Your love lives in me.
Your love lives in me.
If only you knew it was living there.
Fatherless girls with fatties
Looking for the next dude to call Daddy
They gladly extend bare arms
Reaching for tatted soldiers that bear arms
But not as Kool as the gang
Situations stay the same
15 year old died after his championship game
The news claimed
He was gang affiliated
Human life underrated
Young men claim city owned blocks
White tees and black jeans
The cycle never stops
The shots never got
The intended target
EMS trucks don’t even bother
Fatherless youth cultivated in a motherless womb
Summer heat always brings out the true goons
Ruthless heat bring cold metal to streets
The whole block gets caught in your beef
Wake me up when it ends
Until we meet again.